It’s been a little while since I have written about Life as an IT student. And this month has had two extremes.
Life goes on and a new challenge! Oh happy day …
The last two weeks of July
July was finally halfway. I challenged myself. Figuring out the different disciplines I came in touch with during the past three years of studying. Figuring out a bit what I like and probably will like even more. I crossed paths with a company and they challenged me! I had my first, real, IT-related interview and a short while after even an assessment. WOW! I feel thrilled again that this challenge crossed my path and that I have been given an opportunity to help with what I know so far and getting the opportunity to expand my knowledge and help then even more! That’s what motivates me every single day. Helping others a little bit as a behind the curtains person and being proud of the product and the work you do and the people you work with. And I finally think…I started walking more precisely in the right direction on the right path. This feels so good!
The month of July in less happier days
The first two weeks
The month of July started with the leftover studyrubbish of June. And I am not looking fondly back to the first two weeks of this month. What an internship documenting for the university of applied sciences rollercoaster. So I am sorry for the disappointed tone of voice in the last part of this blog post which rarely happens, but so this event was unique. Life is hard now and then and life is as it is, so is my story. But it starts in the middle with something more happy and a thing I am proud of.
The internship document, a dreadful pain
The month of July started with finalizing my report/assignment of my internship and later on adjusted it, shortened it with a better guideline and thus I handed it in twice. Accepted? No… “too long”. I am sorry for that, I have written precisely about every process of learning during the internships that lasted together for ten months. Tried to prove everything.
I keep asking myself: why? Why feel I like if I am being punished for writing too long. Being punished for trying to do too good, trying to prove myself. Trying to learn and acquire every competence and subcompetence. I do not like to write a short brief story as if it is not real because where is the proof then? They would ask according to the guideline. “Kill your darlings” is a famous saying for writers. And I know I have to do that this weekend. My internships period lasted for 10 months, 5 more than usual. More than 1000 hours of work on location, more than 260 hours of traveling and another 80-100 hours of work in the documentation and gathering all the proof. I am sorry my internship document last around ~80 pages, but that’s my real story. That’s been me during this experience in study.
The summary, what I learned
We are all just human beings, we make good things and we make mistakes. And we are trying to be as truthfully as possible even in the most difficult conversations. But all parties should try their best. Covering things up is useless because it is no feedback so you can not learn from it.
And for students: no matter the company big or small, should fire you from your internship behind your back. Your company manager should always at least try to speak to you and discuss your work before mailing behind your back your internship lecturer. And they should be honest in the final meeting or conversation. I learned that I should say honestly as well that I heard the previous conversation and that I felt like being lied too, right in my face. The trust was lost. Truth is the hardest thing but at least it’s the truth.
And the university should – as they mention in their regulations – always help you when you are in trouble. And if they don’t or a lecturer / coördinator neglects or has a lack of time – which is common now with a shortage of lecturers – fight for it! Never let you being pushed down by something you are not a cause of nor can help with it.
In my case the university did not take their responsibility, it even costs me at least a full semester!! A full year right now even!! But I can understand it with a lack of teachers and a rare situation… I fixed the new internship myself and I am thankful – as mentioned in an earlier blog post – for the opportunity I got from my last internship company thanks to a study friend and the support of my family and closest people. It took me 4 days to organise it! And it took me three weeks to get a decent feedback and approval by the lecturer/coördinator of the university. Saying “Yes” on Monday and preventing a delay and saying “No” on Tuesday and that for three weeks in a row caused the delay of a full semester! My mentrix? She had sadly no voting right in this situation, I thought she had but it seemed only one person had and our trust in each other is gone for now.
It is what it is, but every person has its responsibility!
Do I look back joyfully on the internship? In terms of looking back at working at and learning from that last company, yes. In terms of the university who says “It’s gonna be the most joyfully part of your study”? Well…obviously no. The worst middle and after-situation I ever experienced and still experiencing since I have to hand it in for the third time…. It’s the most saddest part of my life in study and where I have been fighting for and still am. And I am thankful for the strong support around me of close family and friends because I could not imagine to reach the finish line of this most dreadful experience in study life without their support.
How has been your month of July?
This has been the most sad blog post I have ever written. I am sorry if you had a lovely happy evening or day and made you a bit sad by writing a part of my lifestory. Never forget I am smiling again thanks to the challenges that crossed my path the second half of July. A day only lasts for 24 hours and a week only lasts for 7 days. Sleeping through it or being exhausted of the effort you have put in something, helps. And most of all: appreciating the small little things in life. I love animals and I love the way they appreciate every single day they are alive and live their lives.
So exactly halfway of July I went to the zoo. And a photo says more than a thousand words.
Greetings by Sophie